I used to have issues and I said to him shape up or ship out pretty much and he left but after counseling he decided to work things out it also didn't hurt that the therapist pretty much told him to grow the hell up and stop acting like a spoiled brat lol sometimes they need an outside view. I asked him why he chose to date an Extrovert. Which has made things easier as the pressure is off. I really do love him. We were long distance for over two years and recently moved in together. I wish he had told me that from the beginning of the relationship that he was an Introvert. Or try to push through this and engage in intimacy despite my anxiety? Second, if he stops communicating with you for days after he gets annoyed, how is that going to work if you're in the same house? Mind you, even if I am myself introverted I am myself rather critical of these 'smug' introverts as I feel they deliberately disengage from society and alienate themselves from people around them to their own detriment and lack of personal development.
That's an interesting point you made, ms balance, about extroverts feeling uncomfortable with silence and quiet. But it's a bad situation for you, and there is really nothing you can do to fix his depression. Safety, safety, safety is the relationship equivalent to position, position, position in real estate so well done for naming it. If you are going to be frustrated that he is not very outgoing or does not put much value in this it is almost certain you will continue to feel this frustration. The first year and a half were absolute bliss. He gets things done without I having to tell him or remind him. He told me he became depressed because he moved from Texas to Arizona and plans he had didn't fall through and he hates being here, and is working on moving back but knows it's going to take awhile.
When you can soften into these hardened places and allow yourself to just be, you will soften toward your partner as well. At first, I thought he was seeing someone else and so I asked him. I wonder if my irritation is now just being projected more onto my Dad? He got very upset that I asked such question. I always tell him how much I appreciate him. I've never dated an Introvert prior to my boyfriend and had no knowledge about personality traits of Introverts. He makes awful desicions with his money and his life and than gets depressed because of his situation which he got himself into.
I don't know why I decide to stick around. He went through rehab and got clean all without my help because I had to leave in order to keep what was left of my sanity and self-esteem. He is taking in the choices you are making now and developing a map for how life should be. Registered with the British Association of Counselors and Psychotherapists, which means she has the qualifications and experience to work safely and effectively, she also writes about emotional and psychological health for the national press. It's the most terrible sort of sadness being in love with someone who has to fight to want to wake up each morning.
Doesn't like to spend time with my family, always has excuses or is tired. Get yourself a toy or lotion up your hand and get to work. This behavior is a major strike against the health of your relationship, and it will not go away or fix itself. Your husband probably didn't know what to say or do to 'fix'everything for you and make it better, he may have felt helpless and distress to see you sad, so the only thing he could do was try and distract you from it by talking about himself. I only found out that my boyfriend was an Introvert the other day. If your boyfriend does, then he really didn't deserve you to begin with. We need it in order to reproduce and continue our species.
I am extremely territorial, as most innies are, and it almost feels that guests are messing up the synergy and energy of the home which is to be a peaceful, calm, safe, reliable, and soothing environment. In the end we ended it because he felt so numb he wasn't sure if he loved me anymore. You have no idea how happy I am that I found this message board because I felt like I was the only one dealing with a boyfriend like this. He had scars from a year previously of trying to hurt himself. All of this, before we met. Here, a guide on how to control anger in a relationship: 1.
It sounds to me like he wants you all to himself. When it comes to Intimacy, I'm the one always taking control, which he says he loves. I am just so tired of living life like this, confused, irritated, miserable etc. Although I do not have any kids and I may be younger than you are. Than a few break-ups later he finally confessed that he was a drug addict and that he doesn't remember half of the stuff that happened between us because he was always wasted off of whatever he could get his hands on.
He is still paranoid and thinks that no one is on his side and he is depressed all the time and still picks fights with me over the dumbest stuff but it is no where near as bad as it was. If anything, this is an indicator of things to come if you were to marry him like this. One way to build trust and safety is to communicate that all feelings will be heard, acknowledged, and accepted. I was determined to make it work. Because right after a fight, he cuts me off completely! It sounds to me that he lacks the confidence to venture outside the straightforward act of intercourse. Loving in midlife is deciding to love the whole package. If you think of some way that I can support you, please let me know.